Little Known Jeopardy Clues

Shafted: I’ll take, How Jerry Sloan Probably Feels, for 500, Alex. The situation is not unprecedented.  Star player clashes with venerated coach, ownership sides with star player, coach resigns or is shown the door.  It’s not really right since players are more frequently to blame for whatever situation there was, but owners are generally chicken poo when it comes to their stars and side with them.  But I have never seen the star player traded after the coach resigned.  That is, until the Jazz traded Deron Williams to New Jersey shortly after Jerry Sloan resigned.  Sloan was the longest tenured coach in the league at the time.  And I’m the farthest thing from a basketball aficionado, mainly because I don’t like sports where scoring a point is insignificant in the large scheme of things, but my understanding is that Sloan was respected and admired in Utah.  So how would you feel if you were him right now?  Yup.  Me too.

Douche Nozzle:  I’ll take, Torsten’s Opinion on Rip Hamilton, for 400, Alex. I seem to remember saying something about players generally being the cause of problems with coaches and management.  I’m not saying I’m right but… actually, yes I am.  I don’t have much to say about Hamilton’s reproachable behavior by boycotting his team’s shootaround before the Pistons’ game against the 76ers, pretty much because ESPN’s Jon Barry already said it all.  You collect a check, you show up to work.  A very simple rule.  I make roughly 1/15647098476 of what Rip makes and I show up, regardless of how gruntled or lack there of I may be at the moment.  Sources are now saying that the alleged boycott that Hamilton orchestrated with some of his teammates wasn’t that at all, but I have my doubts.  He’s an influential veteran and pro athletes are known for having underdeveloped social skills and an inability to think and act for themselves.  Hence, I seriously doubt that Tayshaun Prince and the rest of the guys who missed the shoot around did that independently. 

Eff Manchester United: I’ll take, More Or Less What Torsten Yelled At The Television This Morning for 1000. Yep, it’s true. Sorry mom, I do occasionally use that kind of language.  My beloved Wigan Athletic gave it a pretty good run at the EPL leaders today, before faltering late and shipping three goals in the game’s last quarter hour to go down 4-0.  Sure, the game could have been a bit different if Wayne Rooney had gotten his deserved marching orders for his deliberate elbow to the head of Wigan’s James McCarthy, or if Victor Moses had done better with his one-on-on with United keeper, Edwin Van Der Saar, or for that matter if Van Der Saar didn’t channel himself from 8 years ago with brilliant saves to deny Ben Watson and Maynor Figueroa.  And to add insult to injury, now I owe Shaun lunch.  That’s okay though, I’m going to poo in it.  I’ll have the last laugh then.

Pay Attention:  I’ll take, Things The NFL Will Not Do In The Wake Of Dave Duerson’s Death for… can’t put a dollar amount on tragedy. Those greedy bastards are too busy with their CBA negotiations over who should get more billions than to stop and take notice of the former all-pro safety’s apparent suicide. And it’s sad.  Duerson likely will not be the last to succumb to what appears to have been depression/mental illness, and it makes you wonder, when will they take notice.  I’m certainly not the first to write about this, and doubt I will be the last, but it deserves as much mention as it can get. Oversized super-athletes are crashing head first into one another at alarming speeds, yet there always seems to be an air of artificial surprise on the NFL’s part when another of their own is lost.  There are exceptions. Former coach Mike Ditka, and many former players have stood up in recent years and tried to make a difference but the going is slow.  Too slow.

Jimmer:  I’ll take, What I Would Put On My Basketball Jersey If I Were BYU Star Jimmer Fredette for 100, Alex. Pele, Kaka, and host of Brazilian and Portugese soccer players do it. Why not college basketball stars? I really hope he gets drafted by the Celtics.  I want him to go to Boston so they can interview fans there about him. “Yeah, Jimmah is awesome.  We love Jimmah.  GO JIMMAH!” The comedy potential there is endless.

Lastly but not leastly (yeah, I know.  Not a word.  Tried it in Words With Friends), my friend George Ogier wrote a wonderful article about disability in soccer. I recommend you visit www.georgeogier.wordpress.com and check it out. It’s very good stuff.

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