It is all too easy to give this award to Josh Beckett, a guy that basically complained about having just 18 off days a year.  That clearly doesn’t include any of the off-season, spring training, or days that he has just a bullpen session, long toss, or light jogging before getting a front row seat to games people spend hundreds of dollars a game.  But if he wants to consider a great day at the park as work, then I just feel bad for him.  The real douche of the week belongs to the high school Our Lady of Sorrows.  They refused to play, and as a result, forfeited the state championship baseball game against Mesa Preparatory Academy because Mesa has a girl on the team.  Paige Sultzbach, the 15 year old female second baseman, agreed to sit out the two regular season games against Our Lady of Sorrows, but understandably did not agree to sit out a game for the state championship.  Congrats Lady of Sorrows, you have taught your students that there is no such thing as equality and women should not be treated the same in competitive situations.  Don’t worry, I am sure none of your male students will ever have colleagues or even bosses that are women, well done, and contrary to your name, it isn’t a lady who should be filled with sorrows.

 

Bonus Rant:  I spent the past four days up in Flagstaff, Arizona for my brother’s college graduation and came across many oddities on the road, and have decided to share some of my thoughts and observations from the road. And fair warning, these are not sports related.

• Douche of the road: The car that pulls into the carpool lane, slows to 55 mph, and in less than 5 miles, has created a mile long stretch of cars that can’t get by.
• Never trust a strip club attached to the back of a truck stop in the middle of nowhere.
• Coming from someone that lives in place that is at least an hour and a half away from the nearest location, Sonic commercials lie….they are way better than that.  Seriously, I lived the commercials just by visiting.
• In Arizona there is a wash named the “Holy Moses Wash”, I can’t be sure, but I believe it parts in the middle.

• Behold…the elusive car hat.  You know, for when your car doesn’t want to get it’s hair messy.

 

Don Mattingly had 20 at bats against Jamie Moyer in his playing career. That’s more than all but two players currently on the Dodger roster. So, the manager has activated himself for tonight’s game. Sure, Donnie Baseball got his last career hit in a different century, but if you can’t get around on Moyer’s mid 70s heater, you shouldn’t even be playing co-ed softball.

In fairness to the 49 year old Moyer, his ERA is currently a very respectable 4.01. That’s serviceable most places, but especially when half of his innings, give or take, are thrown in the hitters’ haven of Coors Field.

That said, I’m setting the over under on strikes Moyer throws to Matt Kemp at 1, and betting the under.

What does a manager do when one of his players is mired in a slump, having fallen prone to poor habits? Well, bench him for a game or three, of course. Give him time to figure it out. What does a manager do when one of his players violates a team curfew, or shows up on game day hung over, or otherwise participates in conduct detrimental to the team? Well, suspend him, of course. You can apply this to just about any sport. A player screws up or suddenly can’t get it right, well, get him out of there for a bit. You don’t just cut the guy outright. Give him a chance to sort it out.

Why does it have to be all or nothing with a manager? Why can’t a GM step in when his manager goes on a streak of poor decision making that starts costing his team games? Why can’t the GM simply sit the manager out for a few games, turning the reigns over to a bench coach for a few games, rather than firing him, or continuing to watch him botch big decision after big decision?

Dodgers Manager Don Mattingly is a prime example of a manager who needs to be benched. Fired? Not yet. He has some great managerial qualities. He knows how to talk to his players, keep them focused, bring the best out of most of them. He has the gravitas to his words that really only a former player (and all-star at that) can have with his current players. Sure, he also has his flaws. He refuses to call out umpires despite an alarming slew of close calls (and some that were not so close, right Mr. Welke?) going incorrectly against the Dodgers. I firmly believe that a manager needs to be willing to run out there and bump an umpire, go on an expletive-laced tirade in a post-game press conference, rip a base out of the ground and wing it into the outfield. Draw some attention to the fact that, either intentionally or otherwise, the umpires are screwing your team repeatedly. Now, that being said, this is not what this article is about.

Mattingly has shown alarmingly bad decision making this season. This fact has been somewhat obscured by the fact that the team is 8 games over .500 at the time of this article and in first place, but make no mistake. It’s in spite of Mattingly. If not for the Cy Young caliber of pitching being delivered by Ted Lilly and Chris Capuano (guys who were merely expected to eat innings and keep the team in games) and the superhuman offensive exploits of Matt Kemp, this team could easily be 8 games below .500. There is no finer example of Mattingly’s ineptitude than last night’s game against the Giants.

Twice, trailing by one run, Mattingly asked his hitter to bunt in a situation where the Dodgers had first and second, and nobody out. What’s wrong with this, you ask? Well, unless your hitter is your pitcher, or you have the opportunity to move the winning run to third with less than two outs in bottom of any game-winning inning (ninth or later), bunting is simply idiotic and counter-productive. Even when successful. Empirical data proves it, if you even need empirical data to prove that essentially gift-wrapping and giving your opponent a free out when you only get three per inning is moronic. Very few things are worse. And Mattingly managed to pull off two of them within a couple innings of one another.

First, he asked Juan Uribe to sacrifice runners over in the 6th. Granted, Uribe was a collosal disaster last year, but actually has shown signs of swinging the bat better this season. They brought him in to produce. Drive in runs in the clutch. Hit for power. And then, in the exact situation that you paid him $21 million over three years to perform in, you ask him to make an automatic out. It’s inexplicable. Even in the best case scenario, (Uribe gets the bunt down successfully and both runners advance) you have your 8th place hitter up (the very capable AJ Ellis), who would then just be intentionally walked to bring up the pitcher Clayton Kershaw. Sure, you could pinch hit for him… but then your best pitcher is now out of the game and there’s no guarantee you even push the tying run across. Especially with the abomination of players that comprise the Dodger bench (the excellent but injured Jerry Hairston notwithstanding). Invariably, it’s a disaster. Uribe bunts into a double play (though the first base ump cheated missed the call horribly on the back end).

As if that wasn’t enough, the Dodgers had the exact situation in the 8th inning, only this time it was Mark Ellis up. On deck, the inhuman Matt Kemp. The WORST thing you can possibly do is have Ellis bunt, right? Even if he does it perfectly, you are guaranteeing that the best hitter in the universe whose name doesn’t contain either Josh or Hamilton in it doesn’t get to swing the bat. Moreover, you KNOW that the Giants have Javier Lopez in the pen, who hasn’t given up anything to a left handed hitter since Truman was president, to face Ethier. How did not a single member of the Dodger coaching staff intervene. Nothing, I repeat, nothing could possibly have been worse than asking Ellis to bunt. So you had to know that the bunt would be EXACTLY what Mattingly ordered Ellis to do. I doubt you need to be told, but I will tell you anyway. Ellis bunted well, moved the runners up. The Giants walked Kemp intentionally, brought in Lopez to face Ethier, who promptly hit into an inning-ending double play. I have witnesses who both saw and heard me predict exactly this.

If I repeatedly made mistakes of this magnitude at my day job, I would be summarily fired. Quickly. Mistakes are one thing. But seriously, if a manager was throwing a game because he bet against his own team, he WOULDN’T bunt in those situations because he would probably think it would make his self-sabotage too OBVIOUS!!!  I might have a stroke…

Again, I don’t want Mattingly fired. I think he has the potential to do good things as a manager. But if Mike Scioscia can sit down Albert Pujols after the slugger has a homerless April and a batting average near the Mendoza line, if Mattingly himself can sit down James Loney for hitting less than two bucks, Ned Colletti has to be able to step in and remove Mattingly as manager for a few games. He must have this ability, this freedom, this emergency brake to pull. These are the kinds of things than can start lengthy losing streaks if not kept in check. The Dodgers really have an opportunity to build on their good start. Their division is weak. Their pitching is strong. They just have to figure out a way to avoid getting caught in the crossfire of the circular firing squad that is their manager right now.  

Seriously, eat your heart out, Harry Houdini. Another year, another great relegation escape by Wigan Athletic, the little Lancashire team that could. Easily one of the most unfashionable teams to ever experience any kind of extended stay in the Premiership, one can be forgiven for thinking that the Latics have outlived their shelf life in the top flight. After all, other than their inaugural season in the top flight, one in which they finished comfortably in mid-table and never really saw any danger, every single season has been battle to avoid relegation. Some have been more harrowing than others; a late penalty from David Unsworth against Sheffield United in the last game to secure safety, a 1-0 win away to Stoke in the last game of last season after a stoppage time winner from Charles N’Zogbia against West Ham to keep hope alive the previous week. Every other season has seen Wigan finally clinch safety right around Game 37.

Then there was this year. Roll the calendar back to March, and there are the Latics, firmly anchored to the bottom of the table, multiple wins adrift from safety. The officiating has done them no favors, ranging from the comically bad to the blatantly biased, and with 9 games to go, a veritable Murderers’ Row of Liverpool, Manchester United, Chelsea, Arsenal, and Champions League hopefuls Newcastle remain on the docket. When you’re a minnow like Wigan, every match is an uphill battle. Those against the top 6 might as well be the Plight of Syssiphus.

The following run of games really should be the stuff of legend. Wins away to Liverpool and Arsenal, home against Man U and Newcastle (not to mention another robbery from the officials depriving them of a deserved win against Chelsea) away to Stoke (no slouches at the Brittania), and finally the clincher away to Blackburn and it’s another year in the top flight for the Latics. This wasn’t David slaying Goliath. This was David slaying four Goliaths, a schoolyard bully and then (admittedly picking on someone its own size

You can argue all day long about how they somehow manage to pull off great escape after great escape. Maybe it’s luck. Maybe God loves them. But whatever it is, the circumstances under which they do it are what make their accomplishments truly remarkable. This isn’t your Moneyball Oakland Athletics competing with bigger and richer baseball squads using algorithms and innovative analysis to determine what slightly undervalued players might perform at a high enough level for a bargain salary to make the playing field less slanted. This is a team that loses its best players to greener (both in the money sense and the other cliché) pastures after every year. The players they’ve lost over the years would make up a pretty good side. Jimmy Bullard, Leighton Baines, Jason Roberts, Henri Camara, Antonio Valencia, Wilson Palacios, Charles N’Zogbia, Emile Heskey, Paul Scharner, and the list goes on to include other lesser known but influential players like Pascal Chimbonda and Lee Cattermole. Heck, even Titus Bramble fled town for the relative comforts of Sunderland.

Every year, they’re forced to replenish the roster with a new batch of players who must somehow be good enough to keep them up again. And it’s not as if they can shrug their shoulders and just grab players who are established equals of the departed. Wigan isn’t exactly a desirable club in a desirable location! The weather sucks, the team is a preseason pick for the drop every year, and they can barely get enough fans to a home game to populate a nightclub. They have to troll the lower divisions, vulture the relegated teams, venture to far off continents in hopes of unearthing gems who can compete in the World’s best league, with the full knowledge that those who prove to be the elusive gems will merely be using Wigan as a stepping stone to bigger and better things. It’s a battle inside of a vicious cycle.

After this year, they figure to lose Victor Moses, their brightest young star. Hugo Rodallega also figures to exit stage elsewhere, despite an unimpressive campaign. Midfield dynamo James McCarthy is another who might be gone. They’ll likely have to fend off advances for Ali Al Habsi, and maybe even James McArthur, whose late season emergence as a destroyer in the defensive midfield likely drove his stock up. Once again, they’ll hang their hats on soldiers like the dependable Emerson Boyce, whose tenure with the team is surpassed only by backup goalie, Mike Pollitt. And captain Gary Caldwell, who somehow transformed himself from calamity-prone joke punchline to uncompromising titan in defense over the last two months. And Franco Di Santo, whose general inability to score goals might be overlooked due to his top drawer work rate. And Antolin Alcaraz, he of the safety-clinching goal against Blackburn. And whomever else Roberto Martinez can convince to stay on, as well as join his little, unheralded squad, perhaps using the skill-oriented attractive style he imported as bait.

That is of course, if Sir Alex Ferguson doesn’t retire and choose Martinez as his hand-picked replacement in the city of Manchester. Because that’s going to happen one day. Carve it in stone. It’s going to happen. Just hopefully not yet.

It is not all that often you will see two posts on the same topic, but I have to share my opinion of the events in last nights Nationals-Phillies game. I actually loved seeing the game handled the way it was. I am already sick of the Bryce Harper hype, despite him being a key piece of my dynasty style fantasy league. Bryce Harper is being treated like a superstar, but he is only a 19 year old kid with a handful of games under his belt, and, granted, immense talent.

It was obvious, and props to Hamels owning up to it, the ball in the middle of Harper’s back was intentional, but also the right way to hit somebody. A fastball right between the numbers on the back. No risk of long term injury, but a guarantee he will feel it and have a welt to show for it. Harper handled himself like a vet, just jogged down to first, and made Hamels pay with excellent base running. Harper went from first to third on a single, and then stole home when Hamels threw over to first. Both incredibly heads up plays, and one of the few ways to win after getting intentionally drilled.

I agreed with Orel Hershiser that following inning when the 3 hole hitter for the Phillies came up with nobody on and two out, it was a perfect time to retaliate, but Zimmerman passed. At the time, I was disappointed in Zimmerman’s decision. Then, on Hamels first trip to the plate, there it was, the retaliatory pitch. Now, Torsten is right, the pitch he hit him with was awful. There is a right and wrong way to hit a batter, and Zimmerman did it wrong. The ball should be from waist to shoulder blade height and right in the middle of the body, just as Hamels had delivered.

Henry Rodriguez putting a ball in someone’s back certainly would have been a good second option, but the situation was properly handled by all parties. Hamels made a statement that was simple and clear. “Bryce Harper, welcome to the Bigs, you are no prodigy up here, you are just another fish in a huge pond, and I am gonna let you know it.” Harper took the message, and shoved it in Hamels face with the steal of home. Zimmerman hit Hamels letting him know he was not going to stand for him hitting one of his teammates. The managers sat back and let it work itself out, and the Umpire came out with a simple, not theatrical warning, acknowledging, but not adding to the situation,

Overall, I was proud of both teams for the way last night went down. Lots of respect around from me. Hamels for having the balls to throw at a future superstar and be blunt with the media about the fact that is exactly what he was doing. But even bigger respect goes out to Harper. He could have easily complained, he could have easily let it get into his head and slacked around the bases, but he went out there and manned up. He should wear that welt with pride, and then go get a damn hair cut.

So, Cole Hamels claims he’s “old school” after admitting he intentionally hit Washington Nationals’ phenom, 19-year-old Bryce Harper. Now, the reality is, he’s a piece of crap. There’s nothing old school, honorable, admirable, or otherwise positive about what Hamels did; essentially, drilling a guy in the back with a fastball with zero provocation. Now that we’ve established this, let’s move on to the real issue at hand. What is a proper way to respond, if you’re the Nats?

They way they did respond is that Nats starter Jordan Zimmerman hit Hamels in the leg the next time Hamels came up to bat; a tacit acknowledgement that they knew what he was up to earlier. The response elicited a warning to both benches that any more of that nonsense would result in ejections. Is that really enough of a response though?

My answer is no. If you’re Zimmermann (and yes, I know that managers have a say in this matter), how can you not throw your fastest fastball right at the chin of Hamels. You don’t have earhole him (though I wouldn’t be against it in this situation) but you need to remind him of how vulnerable a hitter can be up there. Moreover, you need to show your teammates that when you’re on the hill, guys aren’t aren’t going to be throwing at them because you’ll protect them.

In the 2008 NL Championship Series, Phillies’ starter Brett Myers was throwing at Dodger hitters, including Manny Ramirez and Andre Ethier, with impunity. The chicken#$%^& umpires did nothing, and neither did Dodgers starter Chad Billingsley. Phillie pitching continued to take liberties well into the following game until Hiroki Kuroda fired a fastball above the head of Shane Victorino as if to say, enough is enough.

How’s this for a solution to today’s issue? The Nats have a guy in their bullpen named Henry Rodriguez, their stand-in closer who recently had a fastball clocked at 104 mph. How about warming up Rodriguez and bringing him in the next inning in which Hamels is due to bat, slide Zimmermann to whatever position where a player can be sacrificed for the game, and having Rodriguez drill Hamels with one of those 104mph bullets? Sure, it’s transparent, but what can anyone say? You’ve just sent a message, “nobody throws at the future of our franchise.” Sure, Bud Selig, who is a complete travesty of a commissioner, corrupt and incompetent, would definitely botch the discipline aspect. But isn’t a 25 game suspension for the manager worth the next ten years of your prized prospect batting in relative safety?

If you think that’s extreme, I’d insert myself as catcher when Hamels came up, and lock his oh-so-valuable left pitching arm in a MMA style subission hold and not necessarily let go when he tapped. But that’s just me. What about you?

We’re over a month into the baseball season and they Yankees and Red Sox are occupying the bottom two spots in the AL East.

No analysis here. I’m just going to sit back and enjoy my smugness for a moment.

Huge EPL game between Wigan and Blackburn tomorrow. I hope nobody at my day job has high hopes for my productivity for those 90 minutes.

The Guggenheim group has been in charge of the Dodgers for over a week now, and still no answer to the atrocity that is James Loney? In brighter news, if Shaun is going to pump Bartolo Colon as an early front runner for AL Cy Young, how about a little love for Chris Capuano. It’s not like he’s never been good. He did win 18 for the Brew Crew in ’06.

And I pulled a calf muscle legging out an inside the park homer on my co-ed softball team about an hour ago. I. Am. Getting. Old…

Jeff Francoeur has bounced around a bit in his 7 year career, being with his 4th team already.  But the man Kansas City likes to call Frenchy seems to have found a place he can settle in as a fan favorite.  The Royals have designated a section in the right field bleachers the “French Quarter” and every Thursday home game, a t-shirt and soda is included with the price of the ticket.  While that is a nice deal, sitting in the right field bleachers of any game Francoeur plays just might land you a deal you won’t soon forget. 

It was earlier this season, in a game in Oakland, that Francoeur arranged for 20 pizzas to be delivered to the fans sitting in the right field bleachers.  Along with the pizzas, he sent a signed bat and a personalized message to the fans.  Francoeur can regularly be seen interacting and joking around with fans in the bleachers regardless of the city.

Then, last night, while celebrating the first “French Quarter” night of the season, Francoeur tossed a ball into the section, along with a note, and a $100 bill.  What did the note say?  “Buy some beers on me”.  There is a great video on both mlb.com and on deadspin.com showing the fan that caught the buying the beers for the section, and whole section raising their beers to “Frenchy”.

Francoeur is a guy have have been enamoured with the guy since he came up with Atlanta in 2005 because watching him throw the ball is something to behold.  He has an absolute cannon of an arm, and is a joy to watch, but more importantly, he is a guy that clearly realizes he is playing a kids game for a living, and he is making sure it is as enjoyable as possible, both for him, and the fans that attend the game, regardless of rooting interest.  Bravo Jeff Francoeur!

In a sports world that all too often is filled with sports stories like the Junior Seau reported suicide, “bountygate”, the Bobby Petrino scandal, and guys like Delmon Young being accused of an aggravated hate crime, we focus too little on the great stories of human achievement and decency.  Today one of those moments happened, but only got a few seconds of time on radio and TV.

Today, the Tampa Bay Buccaneers signed undrafted rookie free agent, DT out of Rutgers Eric LeGrand.  In October 2010, late in a game against Army, LeGrand broke two vertebrae leaving him paralyzed from the neck down.  Since, he has been able to stand and even walk with assistance.  He has vowed to walk on his own, and from everything he has accomplished thus far, I am sure he will.  He is a broadcasting major at Rutgers University and has had some sports casting gigs since the injury.  Just a year after the injury, LeGrand led the Rutgers Scarlet Knights football team onto the field via his wheel chair, a tear jerking moment that found itself gracing the cover of SI twice, the second as a well-deserved Moment of the Year.  His new position with the Buccaneers will likely be as a part time sportscaster, but regardless, the Buccaneers allowed Eric LeGrand to realize his dream and make it to the NFL. 

But, this isn’t the first time a story like this has happened.  In 1981, soon after winning a National Championship with Indiana University, Landon Turner was involved in a one car crash that left him paralyzed from the waist down.  That year, the Boston Celtics gave Turner the moment he had earned; he was drafted by an NBA team.

Then there was this past MLB draft.  In a story that went much unnoticed, two teams gave kids a moment they thought was surely gone.  University of Georgia player Johnathan Taylor had collided with teammate Zach Cone in a March 6^th game, leaving Taylor paralyzed.  That June’s MLB draft, in the supplemental part of the first round, Zach Cone was drafted by the Texas Rangers, then, in the 33^rd round, the Rangers looked at the board, and did the honorable thing, drafted Cone’s Georgia teammate, Johnathan Taylor. 

In the 40^th round of the same draft, the Houston Astros drafted local community college standout Buddy Lamothe.  Lamothe, a promising reliever with an ERA under 1.00, was another kid that had lost any hope of being drafted, much less walking, as he was left paralyzed after a recreational accident that landed him in a wheelchair.

I am sure there are other examples of this, but these were the four that came to mind.  Regardless, I would love to turn on Sports Center and see a 15 minute segment on one of these stories rather than hear about another DUI, domestic disturbance, or athlete complaining that his $10 million a year contract isn’t enough.  Instead, share a story of a team that has given a young athlete a moment that surely brought a smile to their face that is simply priceless.

On the day that legendary linebacker Junior Seau was found dead in his home of an apparently self-inflicted gunshot wound, the NFL has also announced that four players from the Saints “Bountygate” team will face bans, the lengthiest of which goes to linebacker Jonathan Vilma. These two significant news items, one tragic, the other both satisfying and sickening, will be inextricably linked.

Should there be an autopsy on Seau, there is little doubt in my mind it will reveal signs of Chronic Traumatic Encephalopathy (CTE), the name they’ve assigned the degenerative brain disease believed to result from repeated concussions. I’m so certain of this, I’d wager just about anything on it.

Back to Bountygate, someone ought to ask Gregg Williams now, right after the tragic apparent suicide of a league legend, what exactly he meant by telling his players that they had to “kill Frank Gore’s head.” Did he mean that they should try to concuss him so badly that he would cognitively degenerate while still a young man, until he finally reached the point of such despair that no other option but suicide remained in his mind?

The other players on the Saints who were suspended besides Vilma are Anthony Hargrove (now on the Packers), Scott Fujita (now with Cleveland) and Will Smith. All three were reportedly heavily involved. But they weren’t the architects. Sure, participation is bad enough. But they had issues like peer pressure and the like to deal with. Nobody was pressuring Williams.

It may seem silly to outline peer pressure as an issue faced by grown men, professional athletes at that. But how silly is it really? In many cases, these are people who their entire lives have had people cater to their whims. They have people who attend classes for them, do their homework, coach them on what to say in every conceivable conversation, etc., so 100% of their focus can be on football, whatever level they happen to be at. Special athletes are noticed early in most cases. There aren’t many late bloomers.

These are prime candidates to suffer from seriously impaired social development. Look at Tiger Woods. when you’re in an evironment as a child, adolescent, teen, and young adult where you’re shielded through so much, you never learn the true meaning of consequence. All actions have consequences. You don’t learn real social skills. You don’t know how to talk your way out of a bad situation. You don’t say no. You don’t know how.

Gregg Williams, he doesn’t have that excuse. He’s a coach, not some younger, impressionable super athlete who is being groomed for stardom. He knew what he was doing. Do I think he wanted Frank Gore dead? Of course not. But death from injury in football, even if it occurs ten or fifteen years down the road, is still a very real possibility. 250lb men are running 4.5 second 40 yard dashes. At each other.

To our regular readers, I apologize for belaboring the Williams situation. But I’m not going to stop until Roger Goodell does the right thing, and offially makes Williams’ indefinite suspension an unequivocal lifetime ban. If Bart Giamatti can ban Pete Rose for life from baseball for betting ON HIS OWN TEAM TO WIN, then Goodell can ban Williams for bribing his players to intentionally endanger the life of another man.

You know I’m right. And it sucks that people have to die to drive home the point. Seau had a family. Frank Gore still has a family. They’re the ones who will suffer. To paraphrase a Diamond Rio song, God only cries for the living, not the passed. It’s the living that are left to carry on.

Seau’s death isn’t the first of its kind, and sadly it very likely will not be the last. But it’s the most high profile to this point, and if anything good can possibly come of it, this is it.