Where I am lubed up on my fifth water of the day.

John Mayberry Jr. – Mayberry, a bench player for the Philladelphia Phillies saw something he liked in an actress in the movie Just Go With It, Antionette Nikprelaj.  So, he did what any guy would do, called his agent and told him to get him in touch with her.  His agent did send an email to her agent and started the email with “I hate to be sending you this email and am quite embarrassed to say the least”, then informed her agent that Mayberry would like to invite her to a baseball game and described Mayberry as “a great guy, down-to-earth, humble, Stanford-educated, etc”.  One thing Mayberry didn’t check first was to see if Antionette was already married, which she is.  Hunter Pence responded on Twitter staying something along the lines of “would anyone like to go on a date with my boy John Mayberry? He is Stanford-educated”.

Kelvin Goliday – Head football coach at Garfield High School in the Seattle area made news last week.  In the third quarter, Goliday was not fond of a call, pulled his team off the field and did ordered them to remain on the sidelines.  As a result, Goliday was ejected and the team had to forfeit.

Faulkner University – Alan Moore was named the kicker for Faulkner University, a small christian university in Alabama.  What makes this a story?  Moore is a 61 year old Vietnam war veteran.

Miami Dolphins – On October 23rd, the Miami Dolphins will honor the 2008 National Champion Florida Gators football team.  This is strange enough given that the Florida Gators are a rival of the hometown Miami Hurricanes, but even worse, the Dolphins will be playing the Denver Broncos on October 23rd.  So yes, the Dolphins will be honoring their opponents 3rd string quarterback.  Nothing screams team pride like putting your rival and opponent up on a pedestal.

Paul Hamm – The former olympian and now former Ohio State gymnastics coach was recently arrested.  Hamm took a taxi home after a night out, fell asleep on the way home, and when the cab driver woke him up at his destination, Hamm refused to pay the $23 fare.  According to the cab driver, Hamm elbowed, punched, and kicked him.  When the police arrived, they struggled to get him under control.  In a video released by the police you can hear Hamm say “All the sudden, looking at my wallet and I’m looking at a situation, I don’t have my ID” to which the officer simply responded, “That’s cause I have it man, You gave it to me less than 5 minutes ago”.  During the struggle with the to get Hamm under control you can also hear him yell out, “You guys are so funny.  You guys have no idea.  I’m going to kill you guys.” 

New England Patriots – In a press conference the other day, Tom Brady told fans to “start drinking early, get lubed up and root on the team.”  A refreshing moment of candidness from an otherwise scripted guy.  Then the Patriots turned a comical comment into the worst PR spin of all time.  The Patriots released a statement saying brady actually meant stay hydrated, drink lot’s of water, and drink responsibly.  Um, yeah, sure.

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