Horribly Premature Baseball Observations

What good is it being a fan if you can’t overreact to the events of the first series of the season (for most teams, anyway)? Seriously, overreacting is the last remnant of our childhood we can safely do when it comes to sports and not worry too much about jail time. Other things, jail. Almost certainly. But not the start of the season. Right?
Observation 1: Yu Darvish looked ordinary against Seattle, with poor command and little deception. Send him back to the J League.
Reality: People forget, Yu is basically a kid. He was trying too hard so his normally awesome movement was off. Once he settles down, he’ll be fine. Really, he’ll probably never win a Cy Young, but neither did Hideo Nomo and that dude threw two no hitters.
Observation 2: Wow, the Red Sox Suck! Last place AL East, here we come!
Reality: sigh… They don’t suck completely. It’s mainly just Alfredo Aceves and Bobby Valentine’s idiotic notion that you can turn a swing guy into an effective closer. And the rest of the bullpen too… And Jarrod Saltalamacchia…
Observation 3: Yeonis Cespedes has POWER!!!
Reality: Really? Good for him. Let him at least finish this season before enshrining him, will ya?
Observation 3: Aaron Harang is terrible.
Reality: My GOD is he bad. What was Ned Colletti thinking? Oh right, he’s incapable of logical thought, hence a two year deal for Harang. How is he even employed?
Observation 4: The Yankees blow!
Reality: No team with a payroll on a beeline for a billion dollars should conceivably suck, but wouldn’t it be karmically awesome if they did?
Observation 5: Wow, the umpiring has gotten bad!
Reality: It has been for a while, and will continue to be until officials have to be accountable for their calls. There are some guys like Jim Joyce who, if they screw up a call, you know it’s an honest mistake. But there are more, like Angel Hernandez, where you have to wonder. If you think the Tim Donaghy fiasco was limited to just him or just basketball, you’re delusional.
In closing, can I just say how happy I am that college basketball is done, baseball is here, as are the NHL playoffs? Well, I’m gonna say it anyway. I’m thrilled.

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