Ten Things We Know After Week One of the NFL

Look, if you can’t draw sweeping, definitive conclusions after exactly 5.8% of the NFL season, then what are you even doing? Watching for nuance? Waiting for “a larger sample size”? Please. This is America. One week is plenty. Here’s what we now absolutely, without question, take-to-the-bank know after Week 1:

1. Josh Allen is the best quarterback in the NFL

Not controversial, but it bears repeating. Watching him Sunday night was like watching a master chef build a soufflé while your microwave mac-and-cheese explodes in the background. He’s in his own class, and he just engineered a comeback that erased all doubt.

2. Russell Wilson is washed

And not “this shirt’s a little faded” washed. We’re talking “left it in the machine for three cycles with bleach and now it’s a dish rag” washed. Against a Commanders defense softer than hotel pillows, Russ was still unwatchable. The Jackson Dart era in New York can’t be far away.

3. Matthew Stafford’s back is fine

Preseason whispers about aggravated discs had everyone playing amateur chiropractors. Then Week 1 came and Stafford carved up Houston like he’d been sleeping on a Tempur-Pedic. Will he still throw two or three stinkers this season? Of course. But the back isn’t the issue.

4. Danny Dimes wasn’t the problem in New York

He may have contributed to the problem, but turns out coaching matters. Drop him in Indy, hand him a playbook that doesn’t look like a middle school science fair project, and suddenly he looks competent. Let’s see him against a real defense before we crown him the Prince of Naptown.

5. Derrick Henry is still the sun, moon, and stars of RBs

Yes, he coughed up an unforgiveable fumble that opened the door for Allen’s heroics. But nobody changes the geometry of a defense like Henry. Bijan and Jahmyr will fill your fantasy box scores. Henry fills your nightmares. He’s aging like a ballerina too.

6. The Packers are going to win 13 games

Maybe more. The rest of the NFC looks like window dressing at this point. Adding Micah Parsons to that roster is like giving an F-150 a jet engine. Everyone drools over Philly and just assumes they’ll be back in the big game, but Green Bay is the real heavyweight.

7. The Browns are better than you think

Playoffs might be too rich, but they’re not pushovers. A decent kicker away from beating Cincy, who are supposedly primed for a bounce back season, they should win a fair amount of games. The defense muzzled Ja’Marr Chase and held the Bengals to 17. That’s not luck; that’s substance.

8. Jaxon Smith-Njigba is criminally underrated

If you watched him last year, you saw it coming. Now with DK and Lockett out of his way, he’s ready to pop. The rest of the Seahawks are mid, so his brilliance might get lost, but check back in Week 17. You’ll see the numbers.

9. NFL “analysts” don’t know squat

There are a few decent ones, but by and large, they’re carnival barkers with click quotas. Don’t confuse bluster with wisdom. Yet even a broken clock nails a hot take occasionally, and they might be right about J.J. McCarthy. His first half was a disaster, his second half was gangster. A lot of younger guys fall apart at the seams after a brutal start to a game. Only real tough guys come out firing and leading comebacks. He looks like a real dude.

10. The Chargers are making the playoffs

Yes, the AFC is a meat grinder. Yes, this is the conference with the Bills and Ravens. This is also the conference with the Chiefs, but L.A. just beat them fair and square, and they’re loaded with talent. Don’t sleep on them unless you enjoy waking up broke after betting against them.

The Close: 5.8% Faith

This is the part where the boring people tell you it’s “too early” to make proclamations. But that’s coward talk. Week 1 is the Rosetta Stone, the burning bush, the etched-in-stone commandments of football truth. If Josh Allen falls off, if Russell Wilson finds the fountain of youth, if the Browns implode—fine. We’ll just pretend we never said any of this and move on to Week 2 like everyone else.

Until then? These are facts. Etched in granite. Book them. Bet them. Tattoo them on your lower back. Because in this league, 5.8% of the season is all you need to know everything.

IFSC Koper Lead World Cup Recap: Home Golds, Heartbreak, and Season Crowns

Men’s Recap

Setting the Stage

In Koper’s golden evening, the setters delivered a route as poetic as it was punishing—flowing with rhythm, decision moments, and momentum. It was climbing as cinema, every hold a scene.

Bright Liminals & Early Exits

The climb’s elegance made even a tiny slip feel seismic. Neo Suzuki’s right foot popped early, ending his final at 10+, a gut-punch exit from one of the favorites.
Putra Tri Ramadani quietly became another headline—Indonesia, known for speed climbing dominance, now showing real promise in lead. His first World Cup final was a breakthrough.

Olympic Glory vs World Cup Glory

All eyes were on Alberto Gines Lopez—an Olympic gold medalist yet still chasing his first World Cup win. He climbed to 47, sealing a medal and his best shot yet at that elusive gold. But Toby Roberts followed and fell at 46, cementing Gines Lopez’s silver.

Only One Japanese Climber Could Medal

Satone Yoshida sat nervously on the bubble of the podium with a score of 45, watching as his compatriot Sorato Anraku close the competition. Anraku delivered, reaching 48 to clinch gold—and leave Gines Lopez still chasing his first World Cup victory.

Men’s Podium – Koper Lead World Cup

Rank	Climber	Result
1	Sorato Anraku (JPN)	48+
2	Alberto Gines Lopez (ESP)	47+
3	Toby Roberts (GBR)	46+

Women’s Recap

Slovenia’s Sisters Take the Stage

In the electric atmosphere of Koper, four Slovenian women earned tickets to the final—an emphatic home showcase of depth and talent. Janja Garnbret, in peak form, shared a perfect semi-final climb with South Korea’s Seo Chaehyun, setting up a heavyweight battle in front of Garnbret’s home crowd.

Early Benchmarks

Erin McNeice climbed with a methodical approach, taking her time through the wall. She struggled with the clip before the roof but fought through, becoming the first to touch the headwall. Her climb ended just after, and though she held the high mark through four climbers, her disappointment was plain.

Laura Rogora, often tested by the big dynamic moves, managed to find a more static solution through the dyno. True to form, she flirted with the clock, still in the roof with 30 seconds left. She reached the headwall and guaranteed herself a medal, falling with just a handful of seconds to spare.

The Queen of Koper

Janja Garnbret is only competing in three World Cups this season, and hearing the roar when she stepped to the wall made it obvious why Koper was one of them. She reached the headwall with more than two minutes still on the clock, the crowd growing louder with each move. The finish required a taxing traverse rightward before a dyno to the last hold. Her right foot slipped on the leap, leaving her one hold shy of the top—but the ovation thundered anyway.

The Decider

Seo Chaehyun climbed with McNeice sitting on the bubble at 33. She steadied herself after a wobble around 24 and pressed higher. Once she touched the headwall the podium was set, bumping McNeice out. Seo fell at 38, edging past Rogora’s 37+ to lock in silver and confirm Garnbret as Koper’s champion.

Women’s Podium – Koper Lead World Cup

Rank	Climber	Result
1	Janja Garnbret (SLO)	47+
2	Seo Chaehyun (KOR)	38+
3	Laura Rogora (ITA)	37+

Monza Madness: Verstappen Ends Pole Curse, Browning Breaks Through, and Inthraphuvasak Seals Campos Glory

The Temple of Speed lived up to its billing as Monza delivered a weekend of chaos, heartbreak, and breakthrough triumphs across Formula 1, Formula 2, and Formula 3. From Max Verstappen finally ending a six-year curse to Luke Browning grabbing his first F2 win, and Tasanapol Inthraphuvasak firing Campos to a historic F3 title, the Italian weekend had it all.

Formula 1: Verstappen Survives McLaren Crossfire

The race began before the lights even went out, with Nico Hülkenberg pulling into the pit lane on the formation lap and retiring immediately. Only 17 cars actually took the grid, as Hadjar and Gasly also started from the pits.

At lights out, Lando Norris was shoved onto the grass down the front stretch, while Verstappen cut the first chicane to hang onto the lead. To avoid the stewards’ wrath, he finally ceded the spot to Norris down the main straight to complete lap one.

Early pit strategies kicked off with Oliver Bearman diving in at the end of lap 18, but his undercut attempt on Yuki Tsunoda fizzled—though he made the pass on track with warmer tires soon after. Gravel at Lesmo two briefly looked like it might be a hazard, but it stayed safely off line.

Fernando Alonso’s day ended on lap 25 with suspension failure, and things only escalated from there. Lawson and Tsunoda made contact, Verstappen developed visible blistering on his tires by lap 30, and on lap 41 Bearman and Carlos Sainz tangled, sending both spinning. The stewards slapped Bearman with a 10-second penalty.

McLaren drama lit up the final stint: Norris lost out to Oscar Piastri after a brutal six-second pit stop, only to be gifted the place back via team orders with five laps remaining. Free to race, Norris held second to the flag.

Up front, Verstappen never cracked. He became the first pole-sitter to win at Monza since 2019, finishing ahead of Norris and Piastri. Alexander Albon’s P7 result pushed Williams to 86 points—already more than the team scored in the previous seven seasons combined. Kimi Antonelli crossed the line in eighth but was bumped to ninth by a penalty for erratic driving.

Top 3: Verstappen, Norris, Piastri

Standings snapshot: Oscar Piastri leads the Drivers’ Championship on 324 points, 31 clear of teammate Norris. Verstappen sits third on 230. McLaren (617) nearly doubles Ferrari (280) in the Constructors’. Williams’ 86 is its best season in a decade.

Formula 2: Browning Breaks Through

Qualifying set the tone with three red flags, the last triggered by Richard Verschoor crashing into the wall. That handed Luke Browning pole. The sprint was wild as ever: Zane Maloney spun into the gravel on lap two, bringing out the safety car, and Leonardo Fornaroli capitalized to win.

The feature, though, belonged to Browning. He nailed the start but was quickly chased down by Joshua Durksen, who made an early move for the lead. Goethe’s strategy was undone when Dunne’s crash brought out the safety car right after Goethe had pitted—dumping him to eighth while rivals boxed under yellow.

The restart carnage was pure F2. Shields hit the wall just as the race was about to resume, then Arvid Lindblad locked up massively into turn one, clattering Stanek and dragging Victor Martins into the wreck. All four retired, another safety car deployed. At the second restart, Durksen stole the lead from Browning, while Sami Meguetounif spun through the runoff.

But Browning wasn’t done. On lap 19 he retook the lead, controlled the chaos, and drove on to his first Formula 2 victory. Durksen and Pepe Martí joined him on the podium.

Top 3: Browning, Durksen, Martí

Standings snapshot: Browning’s breakthrough vaults him to the championship lead on 174 points, with Fornaroli (153) and Verschoor (144) still in the hunt. The title fight remains alive heading into the fall stretch.

Formula 3: Inthraphuvasak Ignites Campos

Rafael Câmara arrived at Monza already crowned champion, so the spotlight shifted to the fight for second in the Drivers’ standings and the Constructors’ title between Campos and Trident.

Qualifying had been split, with Ugo Ugochukwu and Brad Benavides topping their groups to set up an all-American front row. The sprint race went to Tim Tramnitz, but the finale was where the fireworks truly lit.

The feature began with a lap-one safety car after Charlie Wurz was caught up, and it didn’t slow down. Benavides and Ugochukwu swapped positions. So many safety cars as another came out was out as Ugochukwu spun into the gravel after hitting debris on the racing line.

Benavides and Nikola Tsolov then went back and forth for the lead around lap 13, Benavides hanging on at the end of the lap. But lap 17 was decisive—Inthraphuvasak launched into Turn 1 and swept past both Benavides and Tsolov in a single move to take control.

Câmara, starting all the way back in 30th, staged a furious charge through the field and ended up P5, a fitting exclamation point to his dominant season.

Inthraphuvasak’s victory sealed Campos’ first ever FIA Formula 3 Teams’ Championship, with Tsolov’s runner-up finish enough to secure second in the Drivers’ standings.

Top 3: Inthraphuvasak, Tsolov, Noel León

Standings snapshot: Câmara ends champion on 166 points, Tsolov second on 124, Mari Boya third on 116. Campos Racing clinched the Teams’ title over Trident, 314 to 303.

The Takeaway

Monza delivered on every front. Formula 1 saw Verstappen break the pole curse while McLaren’s team orders kept the championship story simmering. Formula 2 once again proved it’s the sport’s chaos engine, with Luke Browning finally turning promise into silverware. And Formula 3’s curtain call crowned Campos, Tsolov, and Inthraphuvasak in a finale worthy of the season.

The Temple of Speed might as well be renamed the Temple of Storylines.

DFS Week 1: Daniel Jones, You Heard Me, Value Stack

Two sites, two builds, one approach: stack value at quarterback, lean on wide receiver volume, and mix in touchdown equity to chase ceiling.

FanDuel Lineup

Play Breakdown:
Daniel Jones is the value quarterback who makes everything else fit, paired with Michael Pittman Jr. for affordable correlation. Bijan Robinson anchors the backfield with explosive workload upside, while TreVeon Henderson is the cheap salary relief play with home run upside.

The wide receivers bring both volume and scoring punch:

Mike Evans remains the go-to touchdown threat in Tampa.
Puka Nacua should dominate targets in Los Angeles even with the addition of Davante Adams and provides steady floor with spike potential.
Brian Thomas Jr. is Jacksonville’s WR1 with a new play-caller, giving him genuine upside.

George Kittle offers a strong ceiling at tight end, while the Patriots defense is a value home play with a decent matchup.

DraftKings Lineup

Play Breakdown:
Jones at $5,100 is one of the best QB values on the slate, and stacking him with Pittman Jr. brings built-in correlation. Chase Brown and James Conner are the steady RB plays, while Mike Evans provides touchdown equity at a discount.

Ricky Pearsall serves as the cheap WR pivot to unlock the rest of the build, and George Kittle carries upside at TE. Yes, that is two 49ers without Brock Purdy at QB, but Persall is just too cheap to pass up, as is Kittle. Brian Thomas Jr. fills the FLEX role as Jacksonville’s featured receiver, with the Cardinals defense rounding out the roster as a budget-friendly fit against what could be the worst offense in the league.

FanDuel vs DraftKings

FanDuel: Leans on star power at RB and WR with Bijan Robinson and Puka Nacua.
DraftKings: Balances the roster with Brown, Conner, and Pearsall, while still featuring the Jones–Pittman stack.

The overlap: Daniel Jones + Michael Pittman Jr. is the stack across both builds, with Mike Evans’ touchdown equity and Brian Thomas Jr.’s WR1 role serving as core plays. Don’t be scared of that Colts duo, as Danny Dimes will provide value with his legs and the Dolphins secondary isn’t expected to provide much opposition with Jack Jones and a guy who is literally named Storm Duck as starting corners.

USMNT vs. South Korea: Rapid Reaction, What We Learned, & Player Ratings

Are we wishing for Gregg Berhalter back yet? Probably not, but let’s be real—it’s hard to imagine the results being much worse under him than they are under Mauricio Pochettino. This wasn’t ever going to be a walk in the hanbok-lined park. South Korea are disciplined, skilled, and led by a world-class star who chews up defenders for breakfast. But what we got was a comprehensive 2-0 defeat that could have been uglier than a post-3 a.m. Jack in the Box run.

What We Learned

The Center Back problem is DEFCON 1
Remember after the 2022 World Cup when optimism was bubbling? When all we needed was to find Tim Ream’s successor before he hit Social Security eligibility and pray Walker Zimmerman could stop looking like an MLS lifer pretending at the varsity dance? Yeah, that problem wasn’t solved. It’s metastasized. It looks like Ream is gonna be one of the guys in ’26, and that’s fine if someone athletic like Chris Richards is his partner, but if either one gets hurt, it’s curtains.

Tristan Blackmon is not the answer
This isn’t a personal attack. Blackmon’s a nice story, having a nice season for a nice Vancouver side. But nice doesn’t stop Son Heung-min. He was cooked for Korea’s opener (though VAR might’ve bailed him out if it was in use), and charitably kept trying to donate possession back to Seoul. International quality? Not unless we’re playing in the Concacaf Retirement League.

Sergiño Dest is the sun
Without him, the U.S. attack is a solar eclipse: just darkness and disappointment. Every threatening moment came from his marauding runs. Every. Single. One. His final product will always be chaos—he’s that friend who insists on doing tequila shots before a job interview—but his presence changes the entire vibe of this team. Without him, we’re negative goals.

Pochettino might be a fraud
This isn’t overreaction theater—it’s empirical. The team looks worse. Much worse. Yes, McKennie and Antonee Robinson weren’t here, and yes, they’d help. But what’s Poch’s imprint so far? Other than looking like a man wondering when his Tottenham severance checks stop clearing? If we were promised tactical clarity and got tactical indigestion, at what point do we admit the emperor’s designer suit is empty?

Group stage exit incoming
Optimism would be delusion. If the U.S. weren’t hosting in 2026, they’d struggle to even qualify. There—I said it. Call me negative, but it’s the only bright side I see: at least FIFA can’t kick the hosts out.

Player Ratings (out of 10)

GK Matt Freese, 6.5 – One of the few bright spots for the US. Yeah, he allowed goals, but none of them were on him. Smothered Son nicely early on to prevent a certain goal and bailed out his defense when they melted like a dollar-store ice cream cone. He’s not world class, not even close, but if he’s one of the three keepers the US rosters for the World Cup, he won’t look out of place.

RB Sergiño Dest, 7.5 – Had he not been on the field, the US would have scored negative two goals instead of being shut out. That’s how inept their attack is in the final third. His final product—be it pass or shot—is perpetually lacking, and always will be. That’s just who he is. But his willingness to tirelessly drive play forward is unparalleled from right back and absolutely critical to any pipe dreams this team has about success.

CB Tristan Blackmon, 2.5 – Blackmon is a nice story, having a nice season for a nice Vancouver Whitecaps team. Nice. But he was a disaster in this game. Maybe it was debut nerves, but he was undressed by Son for Korea’s opener (though VAR probably would have saved him), caught out of position on Korea’s second, and put Freese under pressure multiple times with ill-advised backpasses. To be fair, he had a couple of nice interceptions and looked composed enough with the ball at his feet—when facing away from his own goal. But this isn’t international quality. Out of his depth.

CB Tim Ream, 6.0 – I’ve argued the team could survive with Ream as one of the center backs at the World Cup, but only if he’s partnered with someone competent. If it’s Chris Richards, fine. If it’s not, red alert. Ream is still smart, still positions himself well, but his distribution was slightly off today, and he wasn’t blameless on Korea’s second. The backline looks like a retirement home with him, but it’s a retirement home with discipline.

LB Max Arfsten, 6.5 – Usually dreadful at this level, Arfsten actually looked solid here. Worked into good positions, wasn’t exposed defensively, and put in a blue-collar shift. Hard to find much to complain about, but also hard to find much to get excited about. He’s no Jedi Robinson, but he wasn’t the problem today.

DCM Tyler Adams, 5.0 – Adams is an enigma. Sometimes he looks like N’Golo Kanté, sometimes like Ali Dia. Should probably have been booked early for a cynical foul, and then faded into anonymity. And that’s the problem—his whole thing is influence, bite, control. Today? Anonymous.

DCM Sebastian Berhalter, 5.0 – Someone once convinced Pochettino that Berhalter is a set-piece weapon. That person should be publicly flogged. To be fair, he wasn’t outright terrible, and he even forced a decent save early on (though most AYSO keepers stop that too). Credit where due: the Abercrombie-model looks took a hit when he picked up a hematoma, so he at least looked the part of a guy in a real match.

RW Christian Pulisic, 5.5 – Still the most skilled American, but he didn’t show it here. The hope was that he’d make a statement return under Poch, but instead he drifted between anonymous and merely fine. Decent moments, sure, but whenever magic was needed, his pass or shot was slow, heavy, or off-target. Takes too damn long on the ball. Nothing memorable.

LW Tim Weah, 5.5 – The idea of Weah will always be better than the reality. He works hard. He looks dangerous in space. He’ll make you lean forward in your chair—and then spray his shot into orbit. Fired multiple efforts a combined 250 feet high and wide. His great goal against Wales in 2022 remains his high-water mark, and probably always will.

CF Josh Sargent, 3.0 – Why even start Sargent against an undersized Korean defense if you’re not going to use him properly? He’s a striker who needs service, and he got none. Positive marks for defending set pieces. But the attack was noticeably more dangerous the second he came off. That says it all.

Subs of Note

Folarin Balogun: Got 30 minutes and immediately showed why he’s the problem opposing defenses don’t want. Denied only by a miracle save late on. When fit, he’s clearly the #1 option.
Alex Freeman: Entered, instantly became the worst player on the field. Should’ve been subbed back off after 10 minutes. One decent late cross narrowly missing the oncoming head of Richards could have redeemed him somewhat, but he’s a liability everywhere.
Alejandro Zendejas: Limited touches but looked willing to make something happen. Didn’t, but you can still see the tools. Intriguing, if wasted here.

Now What?

If Pochettino’s plan is to make us nostalgic for Gregg Berhalter, congratulations—mission accomplished. If step two is to make us pine for Jurgen Klinsmann, I’m renouncing citizenship and pledging allegiance to maple syrup. Canada’s got room for one more, right? Because if this trajectory holds, we’ll be watching our 2026 “golden generation” flame out epically on home soil. Time is now out. Whatever runway there was to build cohesion and implement his high pressing approach has reached its end. The final product is what it will be. The hope is that a healthy Robinson and McKennie make a difference, but we’ll see. In the meantime, pessimism abounds.

What to Watch This Weekend: NFL Week 1 Runs the Show (But There’s Plenty Else on the Menu)

Week 1 is here, which means Friday night, all day Sunday, and Monday night are spoken for. Still, there’s a full buffet beyond football—Monza at warp speed, the US Open crowning champs, NASCAR going playoff-mode, and elite climbers turning gravity into a suggestion. All times ET; U.S. viewing info included.

NFL — Week 1, Everybody Punches Back

Friday — Chargers vs. Chiefs (São Paulo) — 8:00 PM, YouTube
A Friday night opener from Brazil, streaming-only. Bring snacks and bandwidth.

Sunday (early) — Steelers at Jets — 1:00 PM, CBS/Paramount+
Former Steelers QB Justin Fields leads the Jets against former Jets QB Aaron Rodgers and the Steelers. Chef’s-kiss symmetry for the brunch window.

Sunday (late) — Lions at Packers — 4:25 PM, CBS
NFC North tone-setter!

Sunday Night — Ravens at Bills — 8:20 PM, NBC/Peacock
Prime-time haymakers with quarterbacks who can dominate with thier arms and legs.

Monday Night — Bears at Vikings — 8:15 PM, ABC/ESPN
New head coach in Chicago, new toys on both sides, old grudges.

College Football — Brand Fights & Border Lines (Sat)

Michigan at Oklahoma — 7:30 PM, ABC
Helmet-brand fistfight under the lights.
Iowa at Iowa State — 12:00 PM, FOX
Cy-Hawk = field position, snarls, and a decibel record in Ames.
Illinois at Duke — 12:00 PM, ESPN
A tidy measuring-stick early in Durham.
Ole Miss at Kentucky — 3:30 PM, ABC
Points are a lifestyle choice. Expect them.
Kansas at Missouri — 3:30 PM, ESPN2
Border War spice never ages.

Formula 1 — Monza: The Temple of Speed

Italian Grand Prix (Race) — Sun 9:00 AM, ESPN2
The slipstream is the law; the Tifosi are the judge.
Qualifying — Sat 10:00 AM, ESPN2
Pole is nice; race-day tow is nicer.
F2 & F3 — Support races across ESPN platforms (incl. ESPN+) and F1 TV in the U.S. (check listings).

MLB — September Series to Graze

Blue Jays at Yankees — YES; MLB.TV out-of-market
AL East battle.
Mets at Reds — SNY/WPIX locally; MLB.TV out-of-market
New-look Mets, Great American launchpad.
Astros at Rangers — Space City Home Network (HOU); Rangers’ RSN varies; MLB.TV out-of-market
Lone Star leverage all weekend.

(Treat MLB as a between-windows snack—no need to lock into first-pitch minutiae.)

NASCAR — Cup Playoffs (Round of 16)

World Wide Technology Raceway (Gateway) — Sun 3:00 PM, USA Network
Playoff pressure = pit crews under the microscope.

Tennis — US Open Finals (Flushing Meadows)

Women’s Final — Sat 4:00 PM, ESPN/ESPN Deportes
Hardware and history in prime afternoon.
Men’s Final — Sun 2:00 PM, ABC/ESPN Deportes (Preview at 1:00 PM on ABC)
Daytime coronation energy.

International Soccer

USMNT vs. South Korea (Friendly, Harrison, NJ) — Sat 5:00 PM, TNT/Max; Spanish: Telemundo/Universo; also on Peacock
Useful litmus test in a FIFA window.

IFSC — Lead World Cup, Koper (Slovenia)

Lead Finals — Sat 2:00 PM — IFSC YouTube & Olympics.com (geo-restrictions may apply)
Season leaders Sorato Anraku and Erin McNeice headline—precision under pump.

The Stain’s Remote Plan

Friday night football → Saturday college chaos → Sunday wall-to-wall NFL with MLB snackable innings between windows → Monza at breakfast → tennis trophies → NASCAR elbows out. Monday night is the nightcap. Hydrate accordingly.

NFL Season Predictions (That Will Absolutely Age Poorly)

We’ve made it. Fantasy draft boards are wiped clean, preseason panic attacks are in the rearview, and the NFL season kicks off tonight. Dallas heads to Philadelphia, and Jerry Jones is once again basking in the spotlight—not because the Cowboys are contenders, but because he just traded away one of the league’s best defenders. Only Jerry.

So, with chaos already underway, here are the NFL predictions that will almost certainly go wrong.

AFC Picks

East: Buffalo Bills
North: Baltimore Ravens
South: Houston Texans
West: Kansas City Chiefs
Wild Cards: Denver Broncos, New England Patriots, Cincinnati Bengals

The AFC is quarterback country. Each division winner boasts the top QB in that group, plain and simple. The Broncos? Not a one-year wonder—defense upgraded, offense loaded, and Drake Maye ready to pop. The Bengals? They’ll need fireworks weekly to cover up their defense, but Joe Burrow & Co. can drop 50 on anyone. Surprise miss: the Chargers stumble out of the picture.

NFC Picks

East: Philadelphia Eagles
North: Green Bay Packers
South: Tampa Bay Buccaneers
West: Los Angeles Rams
Wild Cards: Washington Commanders, Minnesota Vikings, Carolina Panthers

The Eagles stay perched atop the East, but Washington isn’t going away. Micah Parsons boosts the Packers into division glory, while Baker Mayfield keeps the Bucs rolling. The Rams emerge from a crowded West where everyone hangs around into December. Minnesota rides JJ McCarthy into a playoff berth, and Carolina is the shocker—sliding in while Detroit, with two new coordinators, slides out.

Awards & Big Finish

MVP: Joe Burrow
Defensive Player of the Year: Micah Parsons
Offensive Rookie of the Year: Ashton Jeanty
Defensive Rookie of the Year: Malaki Starks
Super Bowl: Ravens over Packers

Book it, screenshot it, and come laugh at it in January.

F1 Netherlands Recap: Piastri Surges, Weug Shines, and Chaos Everywhere

The summer break is over, engines are hot, and Formula 1 is officially back. Both the F1 Academy and the big show delivered a weekend full of drama, milestones, and messy storylines.

F1 Academy: Home Heroes & Birthday Magic

Qualifying started on a damp track and wet tires, red flags flying before a single lap time stuck. Lia Block gambled early on slicks, but it was Maya Weug—roaring in front of her home fans—who stormed to pole.

Race One flipped the grid for the top eight, putting Nina Gademan on pole on her 22nd birthday. After Tina Hausmann crunched her PREMA into the wall, Weug carved from eighth to third, Block scored her first podium, and Gademan held on for a storybook maiden win.

Race Two had heartbreak before the lights: title contender Chloe Chambers never got off the line. Weug did, leading wire to wire for a home-soil victory. Alisha Palmowski and championship leader Doriane Pin rounded out the podium, while Esmee Kosterman made history as the first wild card to score points.

With two rounds left, Pin leads Weug by just 20 points, Chambers slipping to third. The championship fight is officially alive.

F1: Piastri Pounces, Norris Burns, Haas Gambles

Max Verstappen opened his home weekend by beaching himself in FP1. Lance Stroll crashed in FP2. By FP3, Lando Norris looked untouchable, topping all three sessions and flirting with the track record. \

Qualifying turned brutal for Lance Stroll, who crashed his Aston again, while both Haas cars bowed out in Q1. Norris lit up the timing sheets with back-to-back track records in Q2 and Q3, but Oscar Piastri had the final word—snatching pole with an even quicker lap and setting the stage for Sunday’s showdown.

Sunday’s race was chaos from lap one. Verstappen hounded Norris early, Hamilton found the wall in the wet on lap 23, and Haas rolled the dice by not pitting under safety car. Somehow, it worked.

The carnage piled up: Sainz tagged Liam Lawson and ate a controversial 10-second penalty, Leclerc pulled a wild gravel-dragging overtake on Russell, then got sent into the wall by rookie Kimi Antonelli—who stacked 15 seconds worth of penalties by day’s end. That wreck handed Haas their lifeline, pitting late and landing both cars in the points despite being eliminated in Q1.

The hammer blow? Norris’ McLaren coughing smoke on lap 65, turning a near-title fight into breathing room for his teammate. Piastri took the flag, Verstappen salvaged second, and rookie Isack Hadjar stole Driver of the Day with his first podium.

The Numbers That Matter

Drivers’ Championship: Piastri 309, Norris 275, Verstappen 205
Constructors’ Championship: McLaren +324, Ferrari second but just 12 points clear of Mercedes
Next stop: Monza, where the Tifosi will demand blood-red redemption after Ferrari’s double DNF.

Only Jerry: Cowboys Ship Off Parsons, Keep the Circus Alive

I was born in the mid-80s, but it was the early ’90s that stamped my sports fandom. Like most kids, I latched onto a team—though these days, after nearly 15 years covering sports, my rooting interest has morphed. Now it’s less about colors on a jersey and more about the people I’ve met, the players I respect, and, of course, my fantasy squads. (Yes, I still sneak in a guy or two from my childhood team. No, I won’t draft their rivals. Some habits die hard.)

That childhood team? The Dallas Cowboys. Blame—or credit—Drew Pearson. When I was five or six, my uncle took me to a sports bar plastered wall-to-wall with Cowboys memorabilia. Pearson, the legend himself, handed me a hat and signed it “Drew Pearson 88.” Next thing I knew, I was watching Dallas lift Lombardi Trophies in ’92, ’93, and ’95. Hook, line, sinker.

Thankfully, adulthood and a press pass pried me out of that fan-cage. I’ve been spared the heartbreak of watching Jerry Jones sabotage his own empire for three decades.

But Thursday? That old Cowboys sting flared again. Jerry traded away Micah Parsons—yes, the perennial DPOY candidate—for two first-rounders and Kenny Clark. On any other team this would be shocking. In Dallas? It was a classic “Only Jerry” moment.

The move echoes the Khalil Mack trade from 2018, when the Raiders shipped their star to Chicago. Difference is, the Raiders at least waited for the offseason. Jerry pulled the trigger a week before a primetime opener against the defending champs and division rival. Brilliant timing.

And the return? Let’s do the math. Mack netted the Raiders two 1s, a 3rd, and a 6th. Those became Josh Jacobs (a hit) and a cast of forgettable names like Damon Arnett and Bryan Edwards. Not exactly franchise-saving. Now Dallas is banking on Green Bay’s late-20s first-rounders. Look at their own recent picks in that range: Tyler Smith, Mazi Smith, Tyler Guyton. Two solid linemen, sure. But Mazi was supposed to fix the run defense already—and now Kenny Clark is here to cover that same hole.

The draft record is decent, but even that success often feels like it happened in spite of Jerry. Flash back to 2014 when the room had to drag him away from Johnny Manziel so they could take Zack Martin. One’s a bust. The other’s a future Hall of Famer. Guess which side Jerry was on.

Even if Dallas nails these two new first-rounders, what are the odds they stick around? Parsons bolted because contract talks went nuclear. Jerry openly admitted negotiating with Parsons himself instead of his agent—a move that might’ve crossed the CBA. Dak Prescott’s extension dragged to the last minute. CeeDee Lamb’s wasn’t any cleaner. This isn’t team-building, it’s soap opera scripting.

The truth is, Jerry doesn’t just want to win. He wants the spotlight. He’s the only owner who doubles as GM, makes weekly media rounds, and hires coaches who never actually get to steer the ship. Despite being 82, there’s zero sign he’ll loosen his grip.

So Cowboys fans, buckle in. That 30-year Super Bowl drought isn’t ending soon. Parsons gone, dysfunction steady, and the Jones Show still center stage. Only Jerry.

Bordeaux, Heaps, and Legend Pass Their First Big Test

Game two of the Jake Heaps era at Legend High School looked nothing like the walkover of week one. A week removed from a 63–10 demolition of Fruita Monument, the Titans hosted Grandview on Thursday night in a game that delivered lightning—literally—and a much stiffer challenge.

Heaps isn’t your average high school coach. He doubles as Russell Wilson’s personal QB coach, a connection that brought Denver Broncos left tackle Garett Bolles into the fold as Legend’s Director of Player Development. When he’s not protecting Bo Nix on Sundays, Bolles is in Parker mentoring the Titans’ offensive line. That’s a serious coaching pedigree for a Colorado 5A program.

And Heaps has a serious quarterback to work with. DJ Bordeaux, a prized transfer and three-star Boston College commit, now leads the Titans’ offense. Bordeaux’s high school journey has been a nomadic one—Highlands Ranch to Alpharetta, GA, to Douglasville, and back to Colorado—but he looks settled at Legend under Heaps’ tutelage. His quickness jumps off the page. Against Grandview, he was pressured all night by Utah State commit Brody Flores, who routinely bent the edge and got by would be blockers. Still, Bordeaux used his legs to turn would-be sacks into positive yards, showing exactly why Power Five programs wanted him.

It wasn’t all pretty. Kickoff was delayed 30 minutes by lightning, and the first half was equally stormy with flags everywhere. Bordeaux threw two interceptions on Legend’s first three drives, part of a sloppy opening stretch.

Across the field, Grandview countered with another Division I quarterback, Blitz McCarty—yes, an all-name team lock—who’s committed to play in the Kibbie Dome at Idaho. Both QBs traded first-half touchdown passes, and Legend added a late rushing score to take a 15–6 halftime lead.

McCarty cut the margin to 15–13 with a third-quarter strike, and a Grandview field goal early in the fourth gave the Wolves their first lead at 16–15. That’s when Bordeaux settled in. The senior orchestrated a pair of touchdown drives in the final quarter, flipping the script and locking down a 28–16 Legend win.

The road gets no easier. Legend heads to Columbine on September 5, the first of three straight away games. Grandview will travel once more, to Ralston Valley on September 4, before its home opener against Legacy on September 12. Both teams showed flashes—and flaws—but with D1 quarterbacks at the helm, expect to hear from the Titans and Wolves again come playoff time.